A breakneck tale of kick-ass, wise-ass, sexy-ass lesbians and ZOMBIES, Eat Your Heart Out opens on what promises to be another tediously annoying day at Ashbee’s Furniture Outlet. Then the strip-mall calm of Nowhere, Ohio, is shattered by the sudden, simultaneous appearance of Renni Ramirez – hyper-competent star of the beloved Rising Evil B-movie franchise – and actual ZOMBIES, leaving Ashbee’s hapless staff and Renni trapped behind an automatic door they can’t lock.
Can failed creative-writing student/apprentice store manager/eagle-eyed markswoman Devin escape the besieged furniture store to rescue her girlfriend? Will Renni’s experience slaughtering motion-captured CGI monsters save the day before the army bombs the town? Once bitten, how many zombies can a person expect to take out before succumbing to infection? Who is the mysterious Deus Ex Machina, and what is he doing with that bone saw?
All of these questions and more whisper behind the scream of the single most important thing Devin needs to know in order to survive: is Renni a top or a bottom?
My first real-life zombie encounter is a pretty low-key affair, considering I don’t even realize at the time what I’m dealing with. I’m under a lot of pressure from all sides this morning: I have to be in early at Ashbee’s Furniture Outlet to shadow the assistant manager so he can teach me how to open; I’ve actually been shadowing Biff for a week now and think I’ve got it down but the manual says every new shift leader needs two weeks of opening training and two weeks of closing training, and there is no wriggle room with Biff Tipping. So I’m already in a hurry when my girlfriend asks me to stop by the coffee shop and get her usual breakfast—a double-mocha Frappuccino thing that I’m pretty sure can’t legally be called coffee. I can’t say no to her because, as she reminds me, she did go down on me the previous night for the first time in two months. I owe her. She has to get to work too, so I am really under a time crunch. The coffee shop is of course packed so early in the morning, and while in line I watch the minute hand of my wristwatch tick past the one, and Biff calls.
Dayna Ingram is a speculative fiction writer. She holds an MFA in Creative Writing from San Francisco State University and a BA in Creative Writing from Antioch College. Her first horror novella, Eat Your Heart Out (BrazenHead/Lethe Press), was published in 2011 to critical acclaim from Publishers Weekly, Lambda Literary Review, Black Static and Rue Morgue (among others), and was a finalist for the Golden Crown Literary Speculative Fiction Award. Her short stories have appeared in the anthologies Zombies: Shambling Through the Ages (Prime Books), Romantic Ruckus (Strange Musings Press), Feast of the Dead: Hors D’oeuvres (Source Point Press), and The Girl at the End of the World (Fox Spirit Books). Her work has also appeared in the literary journalsCollective Fallout and Livermore Street.
Dayna’s supernatural literary horror novel, All Good Children, will be coming to you soon. Meanwhile, she is hard at work drafting her next project, Little Daughter, a dark fairytale series that draws inspiration from various folktales and mythologies. She is also actively seeking an agent.
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